Rape culture and why it's not okay ♡

This blog post is probably going to be out of the sorts with all of my other posts but I feel like it's something I should talk about since I feel like a lot of people my age are not informed about it. I tagged this post with a trigger warning just in case and if you didn't heres another one. So if you choose not to read on, please don't do so. So firstly, let me tell you guys what rape culture actually means. I took this definition from www.upsettingrapeculture.com In a rape culture, people are surrounded with images, language, laws, and other everyday phenomena that validate and perpetuate, rape. Rape culture includes jokes, TV, music, advertising, legal jargon, laws, words and imagery, that make violence against women and sexual coercion seem so normal that people believe that rape is inevitable. Rather than viewing the culture of rape as a problem to change, people in a rape culture think about the persistence of rape as “just the way things are.” So as you can see, rape culture is all around us and personally, I find it sickening. On a daily basis I interact with people that think its okay to make rape jokes. It's really not. The fact people think rape is okay to make jokes about is disgusting and inhuman, and it's getting worse. Now its on TV, in magazines, advertisements, and worst of all politics. Now, you're probably thinking... "Jasmine, why are you telling me all of this?" Well i'm telling you this because I know all of you are the most amazing creatures in the world and its time for all of us to speak up and have opinions. I know so many people who I have talked to (mainly woman) who have no opinion on rape which worries me. I always feel as if us woman need to stick together in this because there are so many men who try to control every aspect of a woman's life. I'm going to give you guys a couple of statistics.

♥ Approximately 61.5% of rapes are NOT reported to police. 
♥ Approximately 28% of rape victims are raped by their husbands. 
♥ A female child is SEVEN times more likely to be re-victimized as an adult.
♥ 61% of rape victims are under the age of 18.
♥ Every 45 seconds someone in the united states is sexually assaulted. 
♥ 97% of rapists will  never spend a day in jail.

The odd's of you being around someone, knowing someone, being close to someone that has been raped is pretty high. We are in the age group thats the highest in rape victims, which saddens me because more people should be standing up for those who are too hurt to speak. Be a shoulder for someone to cry on. Literally, or figuratively. There are so many men, and woman who have victimized that never say anything and are truly hurt inside, so if someone comes out to you and tell's you what happens do not make them feel as if it is their fault. It is NOT their fault. A huge problem with rape culture is victim blaming. A lot of people genuinely think that rape is caused by the way a girl/teenager/woman is dressed. It's not. The way society is trying to brainwash girls is that you should change the way your dressed because you might provoke someone to rape you. That is so wrong, it hurts. Rape is caused by rapists. Not how much you've had to drink, what you're wearing, who you've slept with, the makeup you have on, how short your dress is, NONE OF THAT. Its caused by a rapist. Men and woman who have been raped were not "asking for it" they are VICTIMS. Victim blaming is something that actually gets me pretty upset because a lot of people STILL victim blame, and its all over the news. Recently I read a news article about a young girl who was raped by 12 or 13 men and in the article it stated that she was dressed way beyond her age. I honestly cried when I read that because they were putting so much stress on what she was wearing and how she looked and not the fact that a 12 year old girl was raped by more or less 13 men when she was walking home from school. Victim blaming leads the people who have been raped to believe that it's their fault that they got raped and thats  really not how it should be at all. Which brings me back to being a shoulder to cry on for someone. If someone comes to you and tells you their story never ever question their motives. Don't ask "Well... what were you wearing?" "Were you drinking?..." because thats not what caused them to be raped. 

If you, or anyone you know who has been raped, sexually assuleted, or thinking of suicide please seek help, you are not alone, I promise you. Myself, and so many other people are willing to help. Don't let people tell you its your fault. It's not. There are websites who offer 24/7 live chats with professionals (for free) that you can use if you feel uncomfortable talking to anyone you know in real life. They don't store your personal information so you are talking in a completely safe place. If you are in danger, please call 911. Don't wait around to see what will happen. If you think a friend or a family member is being sexually assaulted please seek help asap, you could possibly save their life. 

♥ For information on reporting your rape click here
♥ For information on child abuse click here
For information on men who have been raped click here
♥ For information on domestic violence click here
♥ To get 24/7 help about rape click here
♥ To talk to me directly you can leave me a message here or here

I really hope I inspire some of you with this post to have a more open heart about life and realize that there are so many people out there that have been victimized. Not everybody who has been hurt has "I've been raped" on their foreheads. Rethink what you say. Rethink the jokes you make. You never know who is listening and who is truly hurting on the inside. If you have been raped, and have not told anyone I really truly hope with all my heart that you do. Getting it off your chest can be a huge part in recovery. Though, so many people recover in so many ways, telling someone, even a stranger can feel like a huge weight lifted off your back. I love you all, stay safe, and stay informed ♥ 


  1. Wow, this really hits home, because one of my friends was gang-banged. She isn't here with us any more, so this really brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for bringing awareness to this disgusting part of our society <3

  2. Well done, I'm glad you put those statistics in, it helps to understand how big of a problem this really it.

  3. Such a great post. I didn't even know what victim blaming was until a personal situation occurred over a year ago, which is why this information is so important should be so much more readily available. Having the blame build up really makes you question yourself when you should know it was not your fault. Finding support really is one of the most important things you can do, especially in this culture, and I feel so badly for the women I have met who have held this "shame" in for years until they finally realized they were the victims. I'm just proud I had the strength to stand up for myself even though it was not until months later, even though I became an outcast, and even though the law did ultimately nothing.


  5. "I always feel as if us woman need to stick together in this because there are so many men who try to control every aspect of a woman's life."

    I think cooperation is always better than one trying to best the other to improve communities.

    Domestic violence and rape isn't just a women's issue, it also negatively effects both women and men. If you truly care about rape victims, you might also look into that as well. Women who report rape or domestic violence are take much more seriously than men.. Thanks for sharing the links, and I think this one might have interest for you as well.